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2008 April - There be Nonsense Here

A showcase of nonsense

Archive for April, 2008


Fun times at UC

Apr 22, 2008 Author: admin | Filed under: Uncategorized

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About 10,000 people gathered to celebrate 4/20 on Sunday by lighting their blunts at 4:20pm at the University of Colorado’s Norlin Quadrangle.

This year far exceed last year’s turnout. The much larger crowd was moved from the traditional site of Farrand Field to the much larger Norlin Quad to accommodate for the amount of people.

The annual event also had daytime concerts to keep the kiddies entertained.

But, the best news of all, not one person was cited or arrested for publicly smoking marijuana!

Fun times at CU!

In the past, officers have tried to catch the pot smokers. One year, the smokers were drenched with the sprinklers to try and prevent the festivities. Back in 2006, undercover photographers were sent to take photos of those smoking. The photos of over 150 offenders were then posted on the department’s website with an offer of $50 for each person identified.

As for the large turnout, a police spokeswhore suspects it has to do with the fact that no one was in class. “I guess it’s not like they had to cut a 4 p.m. class to go do it. People are not all that busy at 4:20 p.m. in the afternoon on a Sunday.”

The crowd consisted of a peaceful gathering with giant balls and frisbees being tossed around. Most of the crowd went dressed in green, and many were seen playing the bongos and having small picnics.

Fun times!

The NonSense is ready to embarrass the kids who cheapen your degree. Remember the rules - If you send in the absolute stupidest, you get a free BustedTee. Read all five and cast your vote. And, if you heard something stupid in class this week, send it to them at CollegeHumor.com/StupidQuestions.

The Nominees

  • A) Southeast Missouri State UniversitySubmitted by Ben

    We were talking about how ethanol was affecting the American economy…

    Lady Einstein: Wait, isn’t there a way to, like, mass produce corn?”


  • B) Iowa State UniversitySubmitted by Jake

    Professor explaining that AIDS was first transmitted to humans through African monkeys…

    The Brilliance: Eww, who would have sex with a monkey?


  • C) University of ArizonaSubmitted by Paul

    After the professor just finished telling us a story about a time that he had trouble when he went to the bank to buy a CD (certificate of deposit)…

    Valedictorian: Wait… since when can you buy CD’s at the bank?


  • D) Penn State UniversitySubmitted by Matt

    Professor: …and Caesar’s death left a power vacuum in the Roman Senate.

    Student: Wait, the Romans didn’t even have electricity, did they?


  • E) Washington UniversitySubmitted by Dave

    Because of the earthquake last week, we were trading natural disaster stories. Our TA, who is from Seattle, was telling us how he was once on a plane headed back home, minutes from landing, when an earthquake hit and disabled the control tower…

    Genius: Wow. Could you feel the shaking?

    TA: Uhh… It was an earthquake, not an airquake.

Miley Cyrus gettin’ slutty, not even 18!

Apr 21, 2008 Author: admin | Filed under: Celebrity, Topless

Miley-cyrus-bra

Oh my, Miley Cyrus is at it again. We’ve seen Miley Cyrus flashing her panties, and before that we saw some “Scandalous” Miley Cyrus bikini pictures, and now we’ve got Miley Cyrus flashing her bra. You know, just for the fun of it.

Also pictured is the 15-year-old star getting cozy with what most teenage boys would call one lucky SOB. I mean, move that hand a couple inches over, and these pictures would be causing a much bigger commotion. Thankfully, everything here’s PG-13 at the most. But let me tell you, once this girl hits 18, there will be absolutely no stopping her.

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Jennifer Aniston Bikini Pictures, start the week alright

Apr 21, 2008 Author: admin | Filed under: Celebrity

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Well, it’s Monday morning once again, and that generally means going beck to work for another week, so here are some Jennifer Aniston bikini pictures to help start your week off on the right foot.

Jenn spent the day working on her tan in Miami on Saturday at her hotel pool, amongst geriatrics, and guys keeping their junk covered and trying to pretend not to notice Jennifer Aniston in in a bikini just a few feet away. Seriously, how do you not just sit and stare if Jennifer Aniston is right next to you wearing a bikini?

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Danica Patrick makes IndyCar history

Apr 21, 2008 Author: admin | Filed under: Celebrity

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NEWSFLASH: Women allowed to drive automobiles. How? Why? Oh, God, who will iron the shirts?! Seriously, I didn’t believe it myself until I came across this AP article about Danica Patrick dominating the Japan 300 yesterday. Turns out Danica is the first person (and hottie!) with a vagina to win an IndyCar race:

“I’ve been asked so many times when and if I can win my first race,” she said. “And, finally, no more of those questions.”
Patrick was welcomed by her family near the podium. “There was a lot of “I love you,’ and ‘congratulations,’ Patrick said. “My dad said it was the best day of his life.”
Michael Andretti, co-owner of Andretti Green Racing, called his driver a “fantastic person.”
“I’m thrilled for her that the monkey is finally off of her back,” said Andretti, co-owner of Andretti Green Racing. “We have all believed in her and she proved today that she is a winner. Frankly, I think this is the first of many.”

I think I speak for everybody when I say, monkeys shouldn’t be allowed in race cars - unless it’s firing a gun at the other drivers while wearing an eye-patch. When something’s that adorable, you just gotta laugh and remember primates can’t be prosecuted. Right, my secret gang of chimpanzee jewel thieves? Now go fetch me diamonds! … Or flagrantly masturbate on the coffee table. Again. I swear, it’s like you guys have never seen The View before. My, my, my. Hello, Joy Behar…

Halfbaked

But I’ll still say it; I was walking down the street and people just kept saying “Happy 4:20” when I was passing by (i really don’t know what it means), but anyways, here it is again HAPPY 4:20 (honest… i have no clue…), Mischa Barton, The Jovovich Chick, and Dre probably do…

I KNOW BARACK OBAMA DOES!!!!!!! Now, with the release of a videotape that shows Obama saying, “We need to decriminalize the marijuana laws,” pot policy promises to be an issue during the showdown between Democratic contenders Obama and Hillary Clinton. Here’s what Obama has said about marijuana and the Drug War so far:

“The War on Drugs has been an utter failure.”
“We need to rethink and decriminalize our marijuana laws.”
“When I was a kid I inhaled frequently. That was the point.”
“Pot had helped, and booze; maybe a little blow when you could afford it.”
“I’m not someone who believes in the legalization of marijuana.”
“I’m not interested in legalizing drugs.”
“If the science and the doctors suggest that the best palliative care and the way to relieve pain and suffering is medical marijuana, then that’s something I’m open to.”
“Mandatory sentences for certain violent crimes may be appropriate, but it has been too widely used. And it is using now a discriminatory impact… We need diversion, like drug courts. Non-violent offenders should not be serving hard time in our prisons. They need to be diverted from our prison system.”

Obama’s stance in favor of marijuana decriminalization and against legalization is carefully parsed. Decrim is viewed as a less extreme pro-drug position. But the effect of either policy would be similar: Criminal sanctions against possesing and selling small amounts of marijuana would be removed - as is already the case in 12 states.

Perhaps Obama will clarify his postion in the coming days. We’re patiently awaiting his tactful but salient words of wisdom on this potent subject. Until then he remains stuck between Barack and a hard place.

Ken Lee by Mariah Carey

Apr 21, 2008 Author: admin | Filed under: Celebrity

Seemed a little far fetched at first, but that Euro Idol crap is FAR FUNNIER THAN AMERICAN IDOL, check out this video!

Rachel Nichols is Scarlett O’Hara

Apr 20, 2008 Author: admin | Filed under: Celebrity

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Here’s the first promo picture of Rachel Nichols as Scarlett O’Hara in the upcoming movie, G.I. Joe, where Scarlett O’Hara now apparently fights terrorism and erectile dysfunction. I kinda owe it to him to go see this movie, because since my father was rotting in hell, G.I. Joe taught me things like taking medicine without a grownup present is a recipe for danger and that I’ll never win if I give in. Thanks G.I. Joe, now I know!

 

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Well, even though she sucked, America voted to keep Antonella Barba on American Idol, so she’ll be around a little longer. Now she sucks twice as much.

We received an email this morning from someone who prefers to remain anonymous:

Here are two pictures of Antonella Barba giving someone a blow job. These are real — I know the guy in the picture. Notice her nose, eyebrows and teeth — you can confirm it’s her by comparing facial feature details to other known pictures.” 
I didn’t think it could get much better than pictures of her on the toilet and hanging out topless and underage drinking, but I guess I was wrong. People sure don’t seem to care whether or not she can sing. They just vote for her anyway. Next week she could walk out on stage, deep throat her microphone, take a bow and walk off without letting the judges say a word, and she’d still get a standing ovation.

 

PICTURES After the Jump…

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Miranda Kerr doing the Topless

Apr 20, 2008 Author: admin | Filed under: Celebrity, Topless

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If you like Supermodels, which I think you do, then you probably like Miranda Kerr, the super cute new Victoria’s Secret model. So it also stands to reason that you will probably enjoy these Miranda Kerr nude pictures as well. If not, there really isn’t much I can do for you.

NSFW Images after the jump

(more…)

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